Do you actually hate “selling” or are you telling yourself a story?
I have said for YEARS that I did not want to have to do anything that required “selling” as part of my job. Well, as a service provider, sales is very much a part of my job. If I don’t “sell” myself or my services I have no income. If I don’t “sell” my course then I have no students and again no income. If I can’t overcome my fear of selling then my business cannot exist. I guess the joke is on me.
Most of us HATE some part of our job—the backend, data analysis, content creation, discovery calls, sales, deadlines, etc.
We have entire narratives in our brains around what we hate and why complete with supporting details and evidence.
I am sitting on a project for my business that would help support The Storytelling Advantage, and I have been for weeks, because I know moving forward with it will require me to sell. I have not been able to find the motivation to just get it done. It has been hanging over me and sucking the life out of me for weeks now. Just last night I finally decided to pause and ask myself, “What is it that I hate so much about selling?”
Guess what. The answer has NOTHING to do with selling. It has everything to do with my own limiting beliefs and internal struggles with my own value.
So often the things that get in our way of completing a project don’t have anything to do with the project. Rather they’re the stories that we are telling ourselves that are keeping us stuck. Our brain convinces us that that stuck-ness is safe. That it is good. That it is better. That place doesn’t force us to confront the story we have been telling ourselves. It doesn’t ask us to rewrite the ending.
Once I got curious enough to ask myself why I hated selling I had to admit I didn’t have the confidence to value myself enough to ask people to support me. Oof. I had all the confidence in the world about my offer but I didn’t have it in myself. Because of that, selling felt vulnerable. It felt scary. It stirred up all sorts of fears and insecurities. No wonder I hated selling. Because all of those feelings were bubbling up all along but selling brought them to a boil.
Today I made a list of all the reasons why I am qualified to even create the offer I need to sell. Then I opened a blank doc and let myself ramble without pressure about the project I need to complete. The one that has been looming over me. I brain dumped about what the project is, the purpose of it, the value it will offer to my ideal clients, the ways it will serve my business, and the reason why it is absolutely necessary as a next step. I looked at the list of all the reason’s why I know I am qualified to SELL the offer I outlined and asked myself, “does the person represented on that list seem qualified to complete this project?”
Spoiler Alert: she is 100% qualified and capable. I mean, I am 100% qualified and capable.
I just finished creating ¾ of the project. In one sitting. Because once I started questioning the story I was telling myself, I couldn’t help but rewrite it. And guess what, I went from feeling paralyzed at the thought of seeing this idea through to actually being excited about it!
That part of your job that you HATE. The one you loathe with every ounce of your being. Do you actually? Or do you maybe dislike what it is stirring up inside of you?
I’ll be talking more about this over on my Instagram. Come follow me there if you don’t already!